Heartbreak is such a bitch gift.
(Photo courtesy of actual heartbreak. Circa 2018.)
Wait, what?
Don’t get me wrong. I’ve been where you are - lost, feeling like you don’t know who you are without your person, wishing you could sleep through the worst of the pain. I know what it’s like to wake up with that ache in your heart every damn day and put on a brave face, but inside you’re barely holding it together.
I see you.
Maybe you knew it was for the best. Maybe you even knew they weren’t your person, but you stuck it out. Maybe you’re wishing you’d done things differently, ruminating over words better left unsaid, or wishing you’d said more.
I see you. I know the pain of wondering how things could have been different if only you’d been in your authenticity, honoring your magic and your power.
I see you, wishing for a different ending to this story.
What if I told you a different ending is possible?
(No, I’m not talking about reconnecting with your ex!)
I’m talking about YOU.
I’m talking about YOUR story.
What if, instead of this being a tale of heartbreak and woe, it was the epic start to your awakening? Your initiation into your true self? Your rebirth?
What if your heartbreak were the catalyst you needed to become who you are truly meant to be?
What if this heartbreak were the gift of a lifetime?
“Someone I loved once gave me
a box full of darkness.
It took me years to understand
that this, too, was a gift.”
Mary Oliver
Here’s my story.
I never thought I needed help.
Sure, issues had come up with partners, but I’d never considered them serious. I’d been in and out of therapy since high school when my parents’ troubles surfaced, so “talking about my feelings” was old news.
I was smart and self-aware . . . or so I believed.
There was only one problem. My relationships never lasted. I had passionate flings with poets, long-distance crushes on yogis, tumultuous love-affairs with alcoholic techies, and an on-again-off-again thing with a poly photographer from Brooklyn. All excellent fodder for the memoir I’d one day pen, but hardly the stuff of long-term happiness.
Until I met The One. (Spoiler Alert: They weren’t.)
They were charismatic, compassionate, and filled with magic.
For the first time, it felt like someone truly saw me. (And when you’ve never truly seen yourself, well, that’s pure catnip.)
I fell like a ton of bricks.
We drove to Standing Rock together and traveled the country in our van. Then a repressed early childhood trauma surfaced, and everything changed. We had only one priority: their healing. When they were happy, I could be happy. So I did everything I could, believing I could make them happy.
Nothing worked, and in the process . . . I became miserable too. It clouded over me like a grey fog. I was blind to everything, smoking too much weed to numb myself.
In the end, they fell in love with someone else.
I was devastated. They wanted to stay together. To be poly. But every fiber of my being was screaming out for me to make a change.
My name iS Jordana
And my purpose is to help transform your pain into your power
“And the day came
when the risk to remain
tight in a bud
was more painful
than the risk it took
to blossom.”
- Anais Nin
So I left. I drove to california &
began a whole new chapter!
Leaving wasn’t easy. I knew I couldn’t be poly, not after how everything had gone down, but I didn’t want to lose them entirely. What if they forgot about me? What if I never found someone who loved me the way they did?
What if, what if, what if . . .?
Finally, a dear friend who was living in the Bay said: “Jordana, you’ve been wanting to move to California for years now. You’re either going to do it or you’re not. It’s time.” (My trusty tarot deck had said as much.) It was exactly the kind of tough love I needed.
Lo and behold, a teaching position with my non-profit had opened up in the Bay, just a few miles away from my friend!
The stars were aligned, so I made the move.
(I even decided to be celibate for a while. But that’s a whole ’nother story!)
I focused on myself. I developed self-care rituals and, in creating a safe space to feel my feelings, I discovered my inner child. She’d been alone for a very long time and what she wanted most was to be seen. To have her lived experience validated by an adult. By me. So that’s exactly what I did.
I traveled to the other side of the continent on a journey to discover myself.
And it was TOTALLY WORTH IT.
“These are the happiest moments of your life -
when the real you comes out, when you don't care about the past
and you don't worry about the future. You are childlike.”
- Miguel Angel Ruiz
10 months later, i met the man
who would become my fiancee
It had become a ritual, driving out to the local hot springs every few weeks. Though I sometimes went with close friends, I more often went alone. I would lower my body into the warm waters and offer myself a rebirth.
I never intended to meet anyone. (I was celibate, anyway, remember?) This was time for me.
Of course, the Universe had other plans. He lived in New Jersey, FIVE MINUTES away from my father who I’d be visiting in a few weeks. And, after I moved back home when my sister got sick, he was there, supporting me through the grief of losing her.
Others had tried to love me during my time in California, but after such a powerful initiation into myself, I knew how I wanted to be treated.
I let them go, sadly, but surely.
Not this one, though! His proposal in front of a Star Wars mural reaffirmed what I already knew: I’d found my match.
And I likely never would have met him if I hadn’t prioritized my healing.
within three years, i’d transformed my life entirely.
I gave myself permission to leave a painful relationship.
I took a leap of faith and trusted that I deserved better.
I gathered the courage to start over in California.
And every day, I prioritized on my healing.
I befriended witches, healers and my soul-kin.
My faith in Source guided me, every day.
I even called in a caring lover and best friend.
~
The transformations didn’t stop there, though. Having been through it myself, I knew that I wanted to help others heal from heartbreak. I started my soul-aligned business, House of Archetypes, and published an Inner Child Journal. I even graduated from CreativeMind’s Jungian Coaching program to become a Love + Confidence coach and began working with people who feel inspired to see their heartbreak as a catalyst for their personal transformation.
“The wound is the place where the light enters you.”
- Rumi
it’s time to reclaim you.
Your identity. Your life. Your magic.
Are you ready?
Some trivia about me :)
I’m pansexual and happily engaged to a man. 💍
I’ve traveled to 32 countries, but my favorite was Uganda where I got to see gorillas get drunk on bamboo. 🍻🦍
I’m a novelist with 2 books published by HarperCollins. 📔📔
I’m a poet and I travel with a troupe of performers. ✒️
Ashtanga is my yoga of choice. 🧘🏼♀️
My fiancee is teaching me to kiteboard and windsurf! 😅
I’m still friendly with most of my exes. No animosity. 🚫
I make a mean peanut sauce. 🥜
I’m low-key obsessed with healthy living and am most interested in whole-food nutrition.
I have a mint-green tiny house named Rosie. (See photo.)
I read tarot for others . . . but I no longer read for myself.
My connection with Source still guides me, every day, toward my Highest Good.
I LOVE Star Wars! I was raised on the prequels and watching them still brings me joy. ❤️
Professional Bio
Jordana Frankel is a Love + Confidence coach who helps people heal from heartbreak by tapping into the magic of archetypes to attract the love they deserve.
Through 1:1 coaching, group coaching, and workshops, Jordana guides her soul-aligned clients through the shadow work needed to discover the patterns and root fears that stand in the way of their ability to receive epic love.
Her unique approach of integrating Jungian archetypes allows clients to not only develop an awareness of their projections, but also to embody their new, empowered identity by teaching them to align with the perfect, whole aspect of those archetypes.
Some of these archetypes include the Inner Child & the Magical Child, the Warrior, Mother Earth, the Mother, the Father, and the Creator.
Jordana blends Jungian depth psychology with IFS-style part work to create a more spiritual approach to healing the heart. She also uses vocal and sound healing to support her clients.
Jordana graduated from CreativeMind Jungian Coaching. She has a B.A. in Literature and Art, and hopes to publish her third novel for teens in the near future.